Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Chrishaps!

I'm sitting here at the window, blogging by the light of our LED icicle lights. Nothing says "Christ is born" like dangly lights you can see from space! Jason put them up yesterday, and they are so bright. I'm worried we're going to accidentally divert air traffic to our balcony. Last night, I sat up way too late watching TV, cause I didn't realize how late it was...the Christmas lights were so bright outside that it made it seem much earlier in the evening. Ha. They are probably a bit much, but our neighbors have them too, so I figure we can look crazy and over the top together.

That got me thinking today about Christmas mishaps...hey, this'll be fun--let's call them "Chrishaps!" Where's that little "TM" symbol when you need it? Whether through excitement, mistake, or zeal; weird stuff goes down during the holidays.

Today, Grace and I went to the shopping centre. I was trying to distract her from crying and being grumpy. It didn't really work, if you're keeping score at home. Her rough night last night may have actually been due to something, as she's been pulling at her ear this afternoon. But anyway! There are these nativity scenes that are everywhere right now--in most shopping centers that you go to. They're all exactly the same. They must be made by the same people and then perhaps donated out? Cause I see them everywhere. I'll never forget, one year when Nate was small he saw one and ran to it shouting, "Look! It's baby Moses!"

Of course, I was impressed by the fact that, even at 3, he understood that Moses was a biblical "type", a foreshadowing of Jesus. Most preschoolers don't have that depth of biblical interpretation. We are very proud.

So today, Grace and I walked up to look at the nativity scene. Anything strike you as odd? Well, aside from the fact that Mary and Joseph are dressed like a wealthy folks from the Renaissance era? As far as I know, Palestinian teenagers didn't really wear velvet. The dry cleaning bills were too expensive. No, to me it's the sheep! That's like the hugest, puffiest sheep I've ever seen! I don't know if it seems this way in the photo, but it looks like the birth of the Christ child is being invaded by livestock with glandular problems. It's kind of distracting.
Look at that! Those sheep are about to knock Joseph over and make off with the myrrh! I stood there today, taking a few photos and remarking on the size of the sheep till Grace started pulling on my dress, going, "Mama--home. Home!" I guess I got a little carried away.

Speaking of carried away, I thought of another chrishap (y'all wait--it's gonna catch on!) today. A few years ago, Becky and I were shopping in TJ Maxx right before Christmas. When I visit the States, we take several late night trips there to caress the handbags and such. Anyway, we were in the back of the store, and started looking at this rack of very festive Christmas shawls. Actually, they were more like capes. They were really elaborate! Some were velvet or satin, many were even edged with faux fur. All these rich, jewel tones. We were holding a couple, looking through the racks. A little mystified at how fancy they were--like, where would you wear these? A holiday opera, perhaps?

And then we realized.

They weren't capes. They were Christmas tree skirts. Can you imagine if we'd bought one to wear? Scarlett O'Hara wearing the drapes comes to mind! Or even better, Carol Burnett as Scarlett wearing the drapes.
Ha! Hilarious. We felt a little sheepish. Chrishaps!

And let's not forget, my brother Dave's HOLIDAYS! sweatshirt from years ago. If you haven't before, please give yourself an early Christmas pressie and go read Becky's post about how and why my brother made this sweatshirt back in college. Keep in mind, he and his friends did this before those "ugly Christmas sweater parties" were popular. Just gluing and cutting felt, like college dudes do. Festive for the holidays! That has to be one of my all-time favorite chrishaps.

So go on, then! Any favorite chrishaps to share? Any ill-advised house decorations, gifts, or crazy stuff you've seen while about? Tell all.




--You guys! I made it! I blogged every darn day in November. It's been fun chatting with y'all. Thanks for indulging me. Tomorrow is December 1st--the first day of summer in this part of the world. School is out in about 2 weeks, Christmas is coming, good things are on the horizon! I'll be back real soon. Now, please return your tray tables to their upright positions and turn off your electronic devices.

xoxo, Amy

5 comments:

  1. So after I posted this, I thought about that woman who pepper sprayed the people at Walmart on Friday. I don't think that counts as a chrishap though, cause chrishaps are well-intentioned at their core. That chick is just plain crazy. Just to define terms here--gotta respect the integrity of the chrishap.

    That is all.

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  2. I love that story of the Christmas capes! I agree that Gracie is a savant. And those sheep are way too big! Your post is funny and I am trying to think of any Chrishaps. Do you count times you have regifted something and the person found out? Awkward. That whole pepper spray thing was bizarre! But then again, this whole country seems ate up( to use a colloquial ) with pepper spray at the moment! Seeing that sweatshirt reminds me that in elementary schools at Christmas the adults really get into wearing themed clothing and jewelry. Then when you leave work and go out into the real world, you stand out like a sore thumb! I'm talking shirts and earrings that have electric lights on them. We are crazy like that.

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  3. Nate's understanding of the Christological motifs in the Old Testament is really impressive, truly.

    I LOL'd for real at being reminded of the Christmas Capes episode. Holiday opera indeed!

    I have so far avoided a chrishap, but I will be sure to share it when it inevitably happens.

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  4. Yeah, you should read Nate's master's thesis. While I think his exegesis of Exodus 14 is a bit sloppy, he's got some interesting ideas.

    Mom, I'm hoping that now in retirememnt you've purged your wardrobe of the flashing light sweatshirts. Mom? Why aren't you answering me?

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  5. As a matter of fact, I have not one single piece of Christmas clothing. But earrings and necklaces.... That's another story. They're small and take up so little space ....ya know? Necklaces with bells are the best except you can't sneak up on anybody. ha!

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