Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Safari cannot open this page because it is not connected to the Internet

Inexplicably, our Internet is down today. And we done paid the bill and everything! This happens from time to time. And when we call our service provider, they say helpful things like, "Hmmm, we haven't had any reported outages in your area." And we are like, "THIS IS WHAT I AM DOING. I AM REPORTING AN OUTAGE." And they're like, Oh. And then we open our mouths in a silent scream, like that soul in the Edvard Munsch painting. (Which I can't google to see if I spelled it right, obvs.)

So tonight, friends I'm blogging to you from my iPhone; on the tiniest, cutest little 3G bar you've ever seen. Just one lil' bar. It's adorable, really. So scrappy and ready to take on the world. Yet so very feeble.

I feel like this is what it must've been like for Laura Ingalls Wilder, when she blogged in the big woods of Wisconsin. Between Pa slaughtering the pig and making a little balloon out of its bladder (that happened) and Ma hanging the onions in the attic. You know? It's magical, in a way.

I have a bit of a fuzzy head today, if you couldn't tell that already. Its been a horrific allergy season here in Sydney, and I also awoke with a cold this morning. Jason was sick with it last week when he returned from the States. In the process of us exchanging demure, chaste kisses at the airport, I think I caught it from him. But what is one to do?

I took drugs and lots of vitamin C, and have felt like my head is floating 15 feet about the ground all day. (That's about 5 meters, Aussie friends.) And it doesn't help that Grace's newest thing is requesting something: a sandwich, to go to the park, to talk on the phone, and then repeating it endlessly until it's given to her.

Doesn't matter how we answer or reason with her. The same tone, the same inflection over and over AND OVER again. I am not kidding you, I ACTUALLY watched my hair grow half an inch while she was asking for juice infinity times today. I think she's messing with my head. That, combined with the decongestant, kinda made for a loopy day.

So now here I am, drifting from my one 3G bar, to E, and sometimes O. What is O?? Can anyone even hear me? Is this thing on? I'm gonna put this message into the bottle and hurl it into the void. I hope it finds you somewhere warm, safe, and with wifi as far as the eye can see. Good night. And good luck.

Sent from my iPhone


  1. Yes I do remember the Edvard Munsch painting, I believe you spelled it right:) Rebekah found it amusing that Grace wanted to talk to her on the phone today:) hope your allergies / cold improves very soon, it's no fun.

  2. Hi! Have I told you lately that I miss youuuu?! My heart got so warm and fuzzy when I got to see Jason share for a few minutes at church. I almost jumped up from my seat and ran up there to give him a big bear hug! I felt like in the midst of the crowd of people looking at him that he smiled at me.. Can you ask him if he did? Cuz it was in that moment that I finally forgave him for taking you so far far away from me! (and if he doesn't remember smiling at me..well then never mind) :) The big bladder part of the Laura books is my absolute favorite. In fact I think I might track down a pig bladder today and play catch with my kids.. :)

  3. PIG bladder..not big bladder. Sorry. I knew I should've previewed that comment. :) All this talk of bladders is making me have to go... Have a lovely, Internet connected day my dear friend.

  4. Back online...phew! It was scary out there. Thanks, Rosemary! I need my voice back, otherwise Sunday's worship set could be interesting. ;)

    Jane, you make me laugh!! I misss yoooouuu! Jase says he *totally* smiled at you. I'm glad he's been forgiven. He said he looked for you after but you'd disappeared....feeding a baby, I'm sure! :)

  5. Those allergies make you feel lousy, I know. Get a Neti pot for a stuffy nose. It'll help. I am sorry you're feeling poorly.(that's what my grandma called it.) I can picture Gracie making one request after another. She's such a fun little person. Love you.

  6. The "O" stands for Oh My God Where Are You? Stay Alive and We Will Find You. Glad you're back online.

    You know, the pig bladder made a big impression on me too. That and the party in the first book where they made maple syrup candy. I love how she was able to describe that event from a child's perspective, yet also give u's a picture of the whole social scene for the adults.

    I second the neti pot. Also, kissing is gross.