Thursday, March 25, 2010

Insult to Injury

Last night I got to go to Ikea with my neighbour, Jules. (I like to spell "neighbour" with a "u" now. And colour. And "maximise" with an "s". In case you were wondering.) We wandered and looked at kitchens (for her) and ate swedish meatballs. (Yum.) It was the perfect girl date. And we looked at this lamp.

Me love lamp. You see, I actually spotted this lamp at a Thai restaurant after church a few weeks ago. I ogled it shamelessly from our table and contemplated stealing it. (It was sticky-taped to the countertop. Yes, I checked.) And then, imagine my joy when, upon closer examination, I realized it was from my Happy Place.

Jules and I admired the lamp, and later I showed Jase a picture of it. "Isn't this so cool? Wouldn't it make a great bedside lamp or something?" He looked at the photo. "Umm, not happening. Not in our house. That's just weird."

Exsqueeze me? Did you say something? Because it sounds like you just dissed my new favorite lamp. In a very flippant manner. And since when are you so passionate about lamps? Gah!

So, my lamp dream is crushed, like so much things that get crushed. Underfoot.

And now! NOW he is sitting next to me reading the new Lee Child book.

He knows I've been waiting for it to come out and now he's reading it first. When will I get to read about Jack Reacher wandering the countryside and teaching the bad guys a lesson? When will I get to read about how to properly head butt someone? Has Jason forgotten that I automatically get priority in situations like these? I'm pretty sure that was in our wedding vows. Love, cherish, and undisputed rights to the last cookie and new books. Unfair, sir! I wish you could be here and see how smugly he's reading it. Oh, here's my glass of wine and my new book. Hmmm. I guess you'll have to flip through that issue of "Home Beautiful" that you've already read twice. It's just rude, really.

Enjoy the book, babe, by the light of our inferior bedside lamp.


  1. I love Lee Child. That is actually how I found your site - on they list a quote from you on I think Gone Tomorrow. Love your site. It is now a daily check for me.

  2. Okay, so I don't know how I have lived all of these years without knowing about Lee Child. I just went to his website and now will try to find a Jack Reacher book. Thanks for the plug. I am always looking for great books to read. BTW, great post and the lamp is ultra cool. Love ya

  3. Tell Jason that that copy is MINE. My need is great. My need to read about head-butting.

    The lamp is heaven.

  4. Well, it's mean of him to read the book first, but I'm with him on the lamp -- I'd be afraid one of those face-hugger things from Alien would jump out of it.

  5. Hi Lily--welcome! I had NO idea--I just checked his site and they totally quoted me! I'm up there with the LA Times. Too funny! And yes, we're big Lee Child fans too. We've read all the Reacher books and then we we sit around all year and wait for the new one to come out. They come out here in Australia a month earlier than in the US, a fact which I use to taunt my sister. Because I like to be petty. ;)

    Thanks, Beck--I knew you'd like the lamp.

    And Friar, being a dude yourself, I'll have to discount your lamp opinion. ;)

  6. That is a great lamp! Very "Oriental":) are you allowed to use that word anymore? :)

  7. OMG, they totally excerpted your review Amy! That is so awesome. He must have google alerts or something. It makes me want to post my Reacher parody.

  8. You SHOULD post your Reacher parody. That thing was hilarious.

    These interwebs are an amazing thing.

  9. Welcome to the land of proper spelling. ;-)

    I love that lamp. I think your hubby is insane to turn it down. And um..who is Lee Child? Should I be reading this stuff?

  10. Just to clarify about the lamp I said the lamp was fine in the Thai restaurant but not next to my bed. No apologies for that.

    Mad Woman yes you should read Lee Childs Reacher series. A good one to start with is The Enemy but they are all good.

  11. I started with Die Trying with the preview of Tripwire in the back. Once I got Tripwire I noticed Killing Floor was another Reacher. It was the year of Reacher for me, now it seems like every year drags by while we wait to see what mess Reacher gets into next. I want to know when Jodie is coming back!

  12. Lily--I know! Now that we've read them all, it's a bummer to wait for the next one to come out. I think I've re-read most of them! Tripwire was a good one, too. I'm nearly finished with 61 Hours now--you'll enjoy it, I bet!