Monday, March 29, 2010

Clearly we are on thin ice. (This is a PUN--you'll see!)

This evening we went to the mall to meet some friends for dinner. (There's a new Mexican place that's opened up nearby. Mexican! Can you hear Jason's whoops of joy from where you are? And they actually know that salsa is more than pureed tomatoes!)

There's an ice skating rink at this mall and while we waited for our friends, Ava and Nate ran to watch the skaters from the windows above the rink. There were some lessons going on down on the ice and there were lots of kids gliding around, as well as some adults out there. Ava sighed. "Mom, why did you never teach me to ice skate?" "Um, cause I don't know how to ice skate." "What?? You told me you knew how!" "Well, I told you I could get out there and sort of move around in a big circle without breaking something. But I don't know how to do any of that stuff."

She sighed again. "Look at them all out there. They know how to ice skate."

I love that her first--her first!--reaction is to blame me that she does not know how to do a triple toe loop or whatever. This seems to be a trend. Why have I never taken her to Paris, why do I never let her have a dog, why have I never told her how volcanoes are formed. I am clearly falling short in many, many areas. Those areas would be: anything that Ava has never heard of, anywhere she has never been, and anything that she does not already know how to do.

I turned to Jason, who was behind me with the stroller. "Well, we've done it again." "What have we done?" he asked. "We haven't taught Ava how to ice skate." "Oh!" he said, "I can teach you how to do that!" "You can?" she asked doubtfully. "So can you skate on one leg with the other leg sticking out behind you?" "Well, no," Jason said. "I can't really do that." Ava sighed and turned back to the window.

She put her chin in her hand. "They all know how to ice skate already."

Failures, we are. Failures at every turn, double axel included.


  1. I had to laugh out loud at this post. Yes, all things can be blamed on Mama. I am glad that you finally got the memo on that. Mamas are responsible for everything wrong, including global warming. However, as they grow they will find out that at the most crucial points in their lives, they will want and need their mama. That is when we mamas know we really did our jobs and it is also the best part of being a mother. Motherhood ain't for wimps.

  2. Ava is so funny ! Don't you remember when you wanted to be able to ice skate? Of course, you didn't blame me for not having taught you how. Her logic is a little wonky. But she makes up for it in cuteness.

  3. Why aren't you trying harder to give her the good things in life?!?

    Tell her that her Aunt Becky took Laura ice skating at Squaw Valley and that she should come live here.

  4. And my kids scream blue murder if you even try to put them on ice. I'll come teach Ava how to skate. I can even put my leg out behind me. For about two seconds. Then I fall on my face.

  5. Too cute :). And this is the first I've heard about Becky, I will pray for her today. Sending you a big hug.

  6. I think the fact that her expectations are so high of you means you must be doing *some* things right. Just not ice skating things ;-)
    Her expression in that photo is priceless. Why must you stifle her so?!

  7. Hey you, there's an award for you on my blog tomorrow.

    Let me know a Becky update if you get a chance.

  8. you clearly ought to be ashamed for the cruel deprivations your children have to suffer because of you. I'll bet you haven't even taught them how to survive indefinitely on a deserted island with nothing but a paperclip and spoon! shame on you.