Saturday, August 8, 2009

Redonkulous Things I Learned from a Magazine

Jason's mom arrived two days ago (I know--I am being way spoiled in the help category), and among other things, she brought me a magazine from the States. One of my favorite ways to zone out is to read a magazine. It's kind of like a mental hot fudge sundae: fun and yummy and okay to have in moderation. (I wish I could apply that last principle to regular hot fudge sundaes. But anyway.)

The magazine is this month's Marie Claire. Now, I usually enjoy Marie Claire for a couple reasons. One, it does not make me feel embarrassed to be seen in public with it and two, there is some actual journalism within its pages. But this time...I don't know, it seems that the wheels have maybe fallen off over there. Or maybe it's me. Maybe I am more suburban, boring, and out-of-touch than I thought. (This is entirely possible.) Here's a few samples...

I love how fashion mags are trying to be relatable in this financial climate. They point out that, in these tough economic times, don't worry about buying whole new outfits. Just update your accessories! They can provide "an instant update to a well traveled look". I'm thinking of adding these to my Gap jeans/diaper bag combo--a pair of metal-studded Christian Louboutin loafers for only $995. Check it.

Somebody's fahhhbulous! Not to be pedantic, but I'm not sure that one can actually loaf in loafers that have spikes on them. They just don't seem conducive to loaf-age.

To be fair, not all the accessories are $1000 and up. You can also get a pair of gold, black dotted Furla gloves for $175.

Do you think I could get the snot stains out of these from when I have to wipe the kids' noses? Just wondering.

Flip a few pages over and find out, as one model proclaims: "Fall is all about thigh-high boots as pants!" Y'all, I had to read that twice. I feel like I'm turning into my grandma or something. But, thigh-high boots as pants? Really?

Are we doing that now? I mean, this young lady looks fetching, but can you imagine rocking the produce section in those babies?

And from the world of work, we are informed that sometimes your boss will be in a bad mood and may take it out on you. In case you were unaware that sometimes people are in bad moods and stuff. So be on the lookout for that.

On pg 108, I learned that Asperger's Syndrome is now the "disorder du jour". Apparently, due to a couple of characters in TV and movies portrayed as having AS, Marie Claire is sensing a "trend" of fascination in it. I'm sure that, across the country, the parents of kids with Autism Spectrum disorders are breathing a huge sigh of relief. It's trendy now! Maybe they'll all get free thigh-high boots or something.

Oh, and a few more tidbits: Red is the new neutral, it's good to brush your hair before a job interview, and it's cheaper to dye it at home than have it done in a salon. But it won't look as good, 'k?

That's all for now. Hope this helps--just consider me your source for completely impractical fashion ideas or obvious stuff you already knew! Have a great day, everyone!

(Ok, I'm hesitant to post this, cause it sounds so cynical! That's not usually my thing, but all this stuff just seemed so SILLY and I couldn't help myself!) Alright, I'm done now. Just wanted to say that. Bye. No, you hang up first. Go ahead! No, YOU!


  1. Oh Amy, you're so cynical to doubt the fashion industry that way!!! When have they ever been wrong???

    Kidding. Yeah, I don't see the thigh high boots working in my life at all. But it's all about makin' it work for you. I could see maybe trying the tights with shorts thing, if only because I'm too lazy to rotate my summer and fall pants!

  2. I gotta get me a pair of those thigh high boots! :) Can't you just see it?!?!! Jane Rowland in sparkling silver thigh high

  3. Chelsea's favorite part about this post: The use of the word "redonkulous" :)
    Love you, Amy! Can't wait to see pics of you rockin those boots down unda!

  4. Is it just me or does anyone else think that snot stains might improve the look of those BUTT UGLY gloves?

  5. I have to wear closed toe shoes when I volunteer at Children's so I'm thinking those thigh high boots might not look so bad while I'm playing Rock Band with some kiddoes in the playroom... or maybe I could purchase the gloves, only wear one and try and bring back that look that Michael Jackson made so "trendy"

    Definitely something to think about, thanks for getting my mind off school work for a bit : )

  6. I just can't believe that Marie Claire thought it was a good idea to label Asperger's Syndrome as the "disorder du jour". Having worked with children with Asperger's and their parents, it seems to me that they are making light of a difficult and challenging situation. Of course, I haven't read the article, but geesh!

    I don't think you're cynical...just realistic!

  7. Could you wear the studded loafers with the thigh high boots? I think that would be really making a statement.

  8. I feel this way whenever I watch the Today show and they do something like "frugal fall fashion" and only feature items from Nordstrom, which I guess if you are in NYC is cheap compared to designers, but come on now!

    Speaking of Marie Claire, here is a link to a lifelong friend featured this month! Not sure if it was in the print version or not, but I thought it was fun. When Ann moved to NYC, I was among those who thought she was a bit nutz, but it turned out well for her.

  9. I loved this post. Because that's exactly the kind of stuff that runs through my head when I'm reading a magazine... and remember: it's GOOD to be a cynical (read: thoughtful, incisive, aware) reader. Otherwise you'd be shelling out for those redonkulous boots. AND the gloves, and the loafers. Gahhh!

  10. I agree--I'd be reading it the same way. Same thing watching TV shows and commercial.Thinking "Are people really this stupid? Do they think I'm this stupid?"
    But it is also fun, like fudge sundaes or a bag of doritos fun. We read them with our lunch here at work. Total mindlessness to help us escape.

    I am trying to picture thigh high boots that would actually fit my legs...they would have to be shaped like a chicken drumstick, all big on top and normal on the bottom...ewww! Or would they be like spanx and I'd be squeezing out the top of them? lol! not cool!